Sad to be here

[Norm914]

First I do recommend you read DR. If you can't afford it get it from the library.

Will do.

Sounds like you didn't really make any changes after your first separation, you just went back to the normal routine and things eventually deteriorated again.

Neither of us did.

This time you need to take a long hard look at yourself and identify things that need improvement.

I so get that, and am doing it.

Then you work on them for yourself. Because if you don't, you will repeat the behavior and continue to have R problems no matter who you are with.

Get that, too.

You said one of her complaints is that you live like roommates. Are you LD? Do you know why?

Yes. Our business has faltered and caused all sorts of financial problems. She wanted to stick with it. I thought it was a waste of time. But I wouldn’t fight it. Felt like I was sleeping with my boss. Pathetic, I know.

Re: her letter, what specifically do you want to address? Why?

“Let’s be friends”. It’s such cake-eating. “Let me rip your heart out and turn your life upside down and rip our marriage apart. And after I’m done with all that, can we be buds? It’ll be a happy ending to the devastation I’m creating.” It pisses me off to no end.