can pursuing a WAS be a 180?

[chatterbug]

Avermont. You have good friends. You can carry on with life. I know the feeling. I went to an annual party that my wife and I always attended. It was very strange at first. But you know what as the night went on. Friends were friends and we talked about silly stuff and occasionaly the heavy stuff. And I made it. I even posted pictures of the night on that evil facebook. ( friends of friends can see the pictures )

Let him have his world he wants. You carry on in the real world and keep working on those 180's.

I was the strong silent type. So this website has been a 180 for me. I also have opened up to myself. 180. I pursue my goals. 180. I have opened my eyes. 180. Like the fear factory song Archetype. ( Sorry I have a love of metal music )

You are very lucky to have good friends. Embrace them. And if your lucky you will be able to help them with their problems as well.

It is very good you started this thread. It has kept you from doing the pursuing. Please do not do this. And when I say you will have lost everything you have gained since August.

Look at what you have done since then.

You survived emotional abuse.
You completely broke down.
You lost your love , future , past and present.
You stopped living for a few days.
You got up.
You looked in the mirror.
You moved forward.
You decided that you are not a victim.
You looked inside and decided that you were strong enough to face your deficiencies.
You were strong enough to reach out in your time of need.
You survived.
You began to grieve your loss.
You are moving forward.


This is what you can lose.

Weight that against what your going to gain the next few weeks by tossing yourself on the ground before your cheating man.

Or you can carry on with your healing. And gain strength. And one day maybe he will wake up. And you will be able to choose instead of beg.

This is where I am at now. Mind you I do not see her or hear her. But I have faith in my self now.

I think you need to have faith in yourself. I also think that you need to reach out and teach some of the other women here how to be come independent.

You are here for a reason. Use your strengths. Learn unconditional love by helping strangers. Then apply it to close friends.

Then when your ready to start another relationship. Apply it there.

You have an opportunity to correct what happened in the first half of your life. You know what you lost and you believe you know what the reasons are that got your relationship to the point where the perfect storm happened.

I do not know you. But I believe in you.

The question is...

Do you believe in yourself?