In shock...

[Lll54]

I too would like you to stay in touch and update us on what's happening in your sitch. Only time will tell, remember that. You do not know your future. Nobody does. Take it one day at a time

[TrentC]

Well, I took my rings off. I have also taken down all but one wedding picture. The one I left up was our first kiss as man and wife. I have a Rosary hanging over it. I am just not ready for that one yet. I feel like God is my only hope right now. I can feel the depression setting in.

As an aside, have you talked to a doctor about depression? I don't think I or my situation would be where we are if I hadn't gotten a prescription for anti-anxiety medication.

It's one thing to be bummed out; but if you are suffering from a chemical imbalance, even a short-term one, you literally cannot think clearly.

Sorry to wallow...I know you all don't want to hear it. I will get over it eventually. Time to GAL, distance, and love my kids.....all in the name of not wallowing.

Wallowing is not the problem. We all want you to be happy and successful, whether it involves reconciling with your spouse or letting him go to move on to a better relationship.

I will check back periodically. For right now though, I don't see my actions as saving my marriage.

Thank you to everyone who tried to help me. I am sorry I was so obstinate and blind. I am still praying that God opens his eyes and mine.

We will always be here if you want to talk or vent.

I recommend (re-?)reading MWD's books in the meantime.

And I again offer my own family's experience: my parents were actually divorced for 10 months before they got remarried, and they never heard of Michele Weiner-Davis or DB'ing. So you never can tell what life (or God) has in store for you.

[praying_in_GA]

As an aside, have you talked to a doctor about depression? I don't think I or my situation would be where we are if I hadn't gotten a prescription for anti-anxiety medication.

It's one thing to be bummed out; but if you are suffering from a chemical imbalance, even a short-term one, you literally cannot think clearly.

I have thought about that actually. I am trying to get in touch with my gyn anyway. I wonder if she could write something? I have also thought that maybe this would help with evening out my moods in general. Maybe it would have saved my marriage long ago if I would have addressed it?? Who knows!

Wallowing is not the problem. We all want you to be happy and successful, whether it involves reconciling with your spouse or letting him go to move on to a better relationship.

Thank you all very much. I know you are a supportive group who will tell it like it is when it need to be said. I need to decide where I am at and stick with it. It seems like I am upbeat and happy and ready to work on it.... then he will say something that brings me down again. I NEED to remember that the WA will talk in absolute negatives. I think he is doing this so much more to try and minimize my hopes thinking it will minimize my pain.

We will always be here if you want to talk or vent.

I recommend (re-?)reading MWD's books in the meantime.

And I again offer my own family's experience: my parents were actually divorced for 10 months before they got remarried, and they never heard of Michele Weiner-Davis or DB'ing. So you never can tell what life (or God) has in store for you.

I have them both in my bag for work tonight. I personally like the layout of DR better than DB. I am going to re-read DR tonight.

I still love him. I still want him more than my lungs want oxygen. I don't know what I did to get him to pursue me in the beginning...well, yes I do, I had a boyfriend of 3 years. How can I replay that now?

I still feel that NEED for him along with the WANT. I think I should find a way to do away with the need. I miss my ring SO MUCH. He saw yesterday I wasn't wearing it and didn't say anything about it. The pictures are still down. I don't miss them as much...I actually feel like the clutter is gone.

Oh, and I love that your parents got back together. I have thought of that situation too. I would be happy with any situation that brings our marriage together again.

[Lll54]

I too still feel the need AND the want. When you figure out how to let that go, fill me in...hehe... I took my ring off the week after H left, only because he took his off. Its been 6 weeks now, and it gets better. Its hard to look at your bare, empty hands sometimes especially when you see your friends and their rings. But hey, you can look at it two ways. One, that finger will be filled one day with the same old ring, or Two, that finger will be filled one day with an even bigger, sparkling gorgeous NEW ring!

[praying_in_GA]

Oh, I also called the Church today to make a counseling appointment. This is something I need no matter where our marriage goes.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

I still love him. I still want him more than my lungs want oxygen. I don't know what I did to get him to pursue me in the beginning...well, yes I do, I had a boyfriend of 3 years. How can I replay that now?

OK, why is everyone looking at Robx, Gucci and McQueen?

Puppy

[praying_in_GA]

I still love him. I still want him more than my lungs want oxygen. I don't know what I did to get him to pursue me in the beginning...well, yes I do, I had a boyfriend of 3 years. How can I replay that now?

OK, why is everyone looking at Robx, Gucci and McQueen?

Puppy

Soooo, I should get out there and find me a man?? LOL!

Funny thing, he keeps asking me if I have contacted the Ex to tell him I am avail again. Maybe I should check into that? HAHAHA!!

He said (way back in the beginning of this thing) that he was sorry he took me from him, he should have left me where I was at, blah blah blah.

[Virtually_Handsome]

I fall on the side of GAL, not GAM (Get a Man)!

[praying_in_GA]

Ok, so this was totally an accident, but....H came to get our daughter to taker to gymnastics. I am getting ready for work and I had just gotten out of the shower. Daughter decided she was hungry so I went downstairs to get her a snack to take with her....naked. Yep, that is when he walked in the door. H said "Look at this!" I said "Oh, K decided she was hungry. Will you put some of this and some of that in a bag for her?" Then I ran upstairs to put on some undies...and came down to tell her bye in said undies LOL! He hasn't seen me remotely naked in almost 10 pounds so I am sure he was a little shocked.

(A little background: I have lost 50 pounds in the last year and I look damn good I think! I am smaller than when he met me!)

[praying_in_GA]

I fall on the side of GAL, not GAM (Get a Man)!

Yes, yes, this I know! I am SO not ready for a man anyway...unless he is just arm candy.