(((Serenity)))) I, for one, love your long posts, so keep em coming!
Right now, for me, this feels like the blackest time so far in all this with bomb2 having so recently been dropped. I have had some rough days. I am so thankful I have my kids or I'm not sure what I would have done. And I am so thankful for this community.
Today... the anger is still coming up, as it has been the last few days. I know that the anger is healthy and it will eventually help me with setting boundaries and getting stronger.
But... I need some input from you wonderful folks out there about what I FEEL like doing vs. what I SHOULD be doing...
I want revenge! No, that's not true, I want justice!
I know what has been said about the OW being dysfuncitional and not worth my time etc. I am kinda past the fantasies about what I would like to say to her directly (although it still feels good to allow that fantasy every so often). But, it has more to do with exposure.
Puppy, I know when bomb2 first dropped, you said we would talk about exposre later when my emotions settled somewhat. Do you think I am ready to talk about that?
I am really pissed off that this is remaining all hush hush because my H is so worried about his job.
Here is the sitch (I hope it makes sense, it's a bit complicated) My H and OW both have full time jobs in two different companies. However, OW does some part time work for H's company "on the side" which her company supports because it is for a "good cause". She is not required to do this part time work by anyone... it is her own choice. But, my H "indirectly" "oversees" the part time work she does. I have talked with my H if he would be considered her supervisor and that this would be unethical but he tells me it is a "gray" area and there isn't really any direct supervision. However, if there ever was a concern about the part time work she does it would be my H who that the concern would come to. (?) In other words, it is still unethical that she remains doing that part time work there. I have considered exposure at her full time place of employment because they support this part time work of hers as they feel it is a positive reflection on thier reputation as a company. I have already exposed the affair to my H's direct supervisor. H was/is furious with me about that and I don't care. My H is in a position of authority and she was doing this work "indirectly" "under" that authority. so, I did already take a step of exposure without your guidance Puppy... I hope it was the right decision.
Not sure where else to go from here. Taking the time off work for self care and basic survival at this point. But getting stronger.
