Well, it sounds like your wife has a problem with everyone.
The good thing, I quess, is her "car pooling" college friend will eventually do something she doesn't like and she will begin to hate him also. So, the question becomes how do you survive in your situation until that point?
The main problem is YOUR WIFE IS HAVING AN AFFAIR. It is going on right in front of your face and every boundary you set up she disregards and breaks. She disagres with whatever you say or do. She walks all over you with lame excuses of your behavior and that you remind her of her father. egads. And worse exactly as Rob pointed out "she projecting her feelings on to you and making it seem like you want the same thing so that she feels better about what she's doing" and you have probably gotten to the point you are believing them. She keeps you in toe and thats a hell of a place to be in.
Yet you are here asking for advice on how to build attraction. What for? to be her friend until the affair loses its luster? I dont believe you have become the WAS you think you have. You have been at this for what over 12 months? It is easy to not feel attachment towards your spouse at this stage. You probably havent had sex in as long as you can remember; you probably fight about everything and have no connection other than the arguments; she runs away from you an admits it to your face; you probably push eachother buttons in spite and resentment; and she spends her time with another man.
If there are other issues, physical abuse, sexual abuse, an affair of your own, drug or alcohol problems time to fess up so we dont lead you in the wrong direction. Because, your situation needs some serious changes. I doubt either one of you are truely happy and your kid(s) are affected by this unhappiness. You like Black Sabbath? I think this is from Vol. 4. Changes.
Originally Posted By: OZZY
I feel unhappy I feel so sad I've lost the best friend That I ever had
She was my woman I loved her so But it's too late now I've let her go
