I'm sorry for your pain. It's difficult for me to advise you without more detail, but I would immediately ask you this:
What do YOU want? What are YOU willing to live with -- and not live with -- in your marriage?
I don't understand why your husband says he doesn't love you anymore, ISN'T willing to do a damned thing to try to work at (and hopefully save) the marriage, but he's also not going to move out . . . all the while giving you no affection?
Are you okay with that?
Let me ask you also: you've been married for 18 years, and your H is giving you the classic "I may have never been in love with you." WERE there any significant signs from him that the marriage was in serious trouble all these years? DID he come to you and communicate that he may have been losing feelings for you previously? Or has this all come out of the blue?
Cuz it smells like OW to me, and the ol' "re-writing of marital history" b.s. that usually comes with it.
My advice would be to get -- and read -- the book before you do ANYTHING. What have you done from May until a few weeks ago when he talked to you?
