It's too hard sometimes

[Gardener]

(Pseudo-bump)

I'm finding new-W not so attractive as I once did. So, I'm wondering if it's her I was so in love w/ or the doormat version of her she used to be. Or it could be that in distancing herself from me, the old her, she's actively choosing to be a new version of herself that I wouldn't want anymore.

I know, confusing. Was it all just a lie I told myself? That I loved her because she took care of me and told me how amazing I was? Am I incapable of loving someone who isn't kissing my butt?

That's all a little disconcerting.

Cut yourself some slack tonight, friend. The answers will come. Just not when you're asking yourself them (and definitely not when you're asking yourself all of them all at the same time!)

Read The Four Agreements.