So, new to the forums, and confused by everyone's love of the acronym, but I'm just looking for perspective from those who have been where I am, which is probably most everyone here.
Found out wife was having an affair with one of her "bosses" at her work. She had initially admitted to it being "an emotional" affair, but one of our neighbors told me the truth. My wife admitted to going to a hotel at noonday in July with this guy. The rest of the blanks can be filled in accordingly. Since that day, 9/1, we have been in counseling together.
My problem is that I'm stuck between protecting myself from her hurtful behaviors (I believe the affair is still going on as of last weekend) and "putting on a happy face" to help win her back. Up until last week, I've been monitoring phone records, etc, but that simply exhausts me. As I've read before on here, I know she's lying. But she continues to wear her wedding ring (at least around me), go to counseling (she says she thinks our sessions are getting better every time, I feel like we're not addressing her continued infidelity and lying), and sleep in the same bed as me, though we seldom hug or kiss.
I signed up for phone coaching, and the first call was helpful. Just feels hard to make it day to day when I feel like she is being sneaky. For instance, she just called me on her way home from dropping my oldest son off at a bday party, and said that one of her girlfriends wanted to meet her for dinner tonight and asked if it was ok with me...Really? I don't believe anything she says. Just feels like I'm handing her over to that guy, on a platter.
