I am feeling really low today, probably also because I am sick but my sich hit me pretty hard today, I just cannot bare the thought of not having my S in my life every day.
4 years ago we moved to a remote part of the country to be near her parents. I drive an hour into work every day, I run her fathers business for him. I work 13 hour days 6 days a week, and my W did not work for the first 2 years and has been starting her skin care and kinesiology business, she is brought in very little money and I have supported us.
if we split I will have to move back to the city as I will not be able to afford to stay where we do now on my own. I am worried as I work for her farther and I have dedicated the last 10 years of my life to this business, we had the view that I would one day take it over.
With the hours I currently work I would have very little time to spend with my S and he would be so far away it would make it even more difficult.
I feel anger and resentment towards my W, I always supported her and wanted her to be able to do what she loved in life, & now she treats me like a dog, that is only good enough to help when she wants it and use my credit cards.
If we do split, I will have to rebuild my life from scratch. The only difference for her will be that I am not in the picture (and she cant use my Credit card), She will have the support of her family, friends and she has been building up her business & life while I have been breaking my back every day. She will not even acknowledge this, and when I did say something she said that she never asked me to work like I do.
On the plus side I did not backslide today and did not show any of this emotion, It just feels like it is to hard sometimes to cope with and I just feel like giving up and telling her to get it over with!
I know I've gotta keep trying, because one more outburst and am almost certain that the M will be over for definite, It's just a crap way to live! Sorry if sounds like pitty I just needed to vent!
M: 30 W: 32 Married: 9 years s: 2.8 Bomb dropped: 7-10-09 same house, bed, no physical contact My sitch: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1871805&page=1
