Hi Opt. Nice thread. I have no experience with legal matters in my sitch (and hope not to!) but I will say that after reading everyone's posts, I agree with what Bill said about each of you having something that you are holding over the other one.

Since I have no legal experience, why can't you drop the matter and if necessary revisit it again in the future. I know I am naive, but isn't that possible? Is it the expense involved? Or what? And please don't all come down on me at once - if I knew the answer I wouldn't ask the question....

While I am at it - and stirring things up - here is a wild idea - and you can dismiss it as crazy if you'd like to - but maybe if your H offered to pay for job placement services for her she would take the hint. I went through that when my job was eliminated and got a lot of assistance and training for only a few hundred bucks.

Quite frankly, it might not be good Dbing, but if I had contact with the OW I would ask her why she is hanging around when your H is clearly back with you - her self-esteem must be in the toilet to hang around like that. And don't say that yours is - we covered that before - you are the wife and have every right (and responsibility) to stand by your man (Tammy Wynette anyone?)

But hey Opt, JMHO, and like I said, I can't relate, I'm trying to offer an unbiased POV.

totite "Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."