Its a day by day thing, isn't it. Just doing the best you can and enjoying each day.
My zero expectations for xmas were based on the fact that H was really spooked by xmas last year, and while I have a great day planned (I love the whole xmas thing), I needed to prepare myself that H may not choose to participate in any of it. Its not about me dwelling on it or thinking about it, its saying it is possible H would not be there, this is how I would deal with it, but now all my xmas energies are focussed on me and my kids having a most excellent xmas. In my sitch xmas was one of the big triggers for H dropping the bomb last year, and I think it was also a big contributor to my second bomb this week. Thats what I talked about with my DB coach a couple of weeks back.
