I never thought I would be here

[2overcome]

As far as the affair, I believe she is running straight into one... According to her words we are seperated and she is going to do whatever she wants. She is already planning to go out this weekend with her guy "friend" who is coming in from out of town. I had told her last night that I'm not seeing anyone to everything's legal. She asked if this is what I wanted her to do, I told her yes that would be the respectful thing, but she is a grown woman and she has to live with her choices. (Because I know she is going to go her way no matter what I say). She keeps saying she wants to find that someone who completes her and not live in an unhappy marriage asking "what if". She even went on a laundry list of things she didn't like about me. I know her vision is clouded, I try to remind myself of that - and chances are that she will find dissapointment and may regret what she has done - I don't know. IF that day comes, I may take her back, but I'm not going to wait forever no matter how much I love her. She's made her choice. It tears me apart knowing she is looking to sleep around - that she can do it without even feeling guilt. While I'm here alone and doing my best to push through the chaos she has put me through. The loss of emotional, physical, and intimate contact is killing me. On top of that it hasn't even been 2 weeks since she broke the news to me. I hate this emotional rollercoaster...