I don't think you are over him. My ex recently got engaged to his affair partner. To me it was a shock but also felt like give the bad guys another point. It bothered me for a few days and I let it go. I can't do a thing about it and I KNOW I don't want him back.
I hope you to get to a counselor because I think you need to work this out so it doesn't affect your new marriage. You didn't say but how soon after the divorce did you remarry?
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory