Still Wondering How To Handle Things!!

[Sanderika]

Hi kissak,

I have been coming here everyday to see if you had written about your date.

Your evening out seems to have been very good for both of you.

I find it very interesting how after all these years apart your H has come to the conclusion (IMO) that you are the only one who has remained true to him.

The OW up and left and didn't waste time moving on. I agree with you that he appears to still be hurt and in some sort of mourning over that relationship. Perhaps he really did love her. He then took on the roll of the "LBS" as her boyfriend. From our views we can certainly understand how devastating it is to be the LBS.

I have read on the BB many times that it can take a very, very long time for the returning spouse to actually get over the relationship with the OP.

I would investigate further with him about the "simplicity" comment. I would not want him back if it was to only make his life easier. I would only want him back if he wanted to be my husband and a full-time family man again, a man who realized what he was losing and throwing away, a man who truly does love me.

I agree with not telling the kids. There is plenty of time for that down the road after you and H spend more time talking and dating.

It had to have been comfortable on both sides for you to have dinner and then do some shopping together. I would guess, if dinner had made him edgy, shopping would have been out of the question.

You sound like you have your thoughts and emotions "together". I will be praying for you and your family that your H is on his way home. Even if he doesn't return right away, just to have his presence about more often and see him participate in/with the family would be wonderful. It would be nice with the holidays approaching.

I agree with mishka, let your H do the work, if he wants it...he will work for it, nothing will stop him!!!

(((((Hugs)))))

Sanderika