PLEASE HELP! - About to completely LOSE IT!!!

[aflowergurlie]

Thanks for the reality check Puppy & R2C - I will be checking into some legal counsel for the support and financial issues.

Today and tonight just sucked. I found out this afternoon that our short sale buyer has backed out and we still don't have final bank approval for any other offers yet. Just throws a monkey wrench into trying to get "D" paperwork filed as I was waiting on that part to be completed and thought that it was going to be done by the end of the month so I could move ahead with the "D".

Then, I got a major headache at work and came home to rest. Feel like my body is fighting getting sick or something as well, and mentally/emotionally struggling too. Still not feeling good, heard H get home around 8:30. H comes and knocks on my door. I go out and H says come here, I want to show you something. Opens garage door and there is the other car from last week again. Asks me what I think about it? I realize he means that it has been painted and I ask him if he painted it? H "Yes, I think it turned out great and I did a really good job on it. Didn't you notice how bad it was when it was parked in the driveway." AFG - "No, sorry, but I didn't really look at it." H "Oh, well, I worked really hard on it and I think it turned out really nice." AFG - "Yeah, it looks good." I'm thinking in my head now, that this might have been a side job for him, but still someone he knows or is affiliated with OW possibly. But still, I want nothing to do with this car or any other car he brings home now.

H "Yah, I have to get this back to them tonight. (Referring to the car.) And I haven't been sleeping much at night so I want to get going so I can get to bed early." (Oh, gee thanks for letting me know your sleeping plans when you're not going to be here.) Then asks to borrow the iron and ironing board. (Great...H NEVER irons unless it's a nice shirt to go out somewhere nice.) I go to my room and close door. Wait until I heard H leave the house later. Go out to kitchen to get a drink and whole house reeks of H's cologne (which smells great, but was the last straw that set me off tonight).

Uggghhhhh. I knew there would still be days of feeling like this, but I just hate it when I'm here in the moment with all the feelings of it. Feeling like screaming out "This sucks!!! Why does it have to be this way? WHY??????" And missing H so bad I can barely breathe. I let myself cry for a while and then I just talked to my SisInLaw and MomInLaw to relieve a little bit of this tension and emotion inside right now too. I know, I just have to keep reminding myself, I can handle this and tomorrow is another day...