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fisherman #1871402 11/10/09 07:37 PM
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no for me, find out what my wife has against me.

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like you all said, she saw me as a controling, needy, fruitcake, not there for her emotionally ever, moved from my mom's house to her house, over sexed, self centered, impulsive, mean, unforgiving, good guy.

wife wants to empower herself ok empower herself against what, that chick was spoiled rotten.

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oh forgot didn't handle the bills, new guy wanted to know what else she said about me, so we can do 180's.

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most of wifes' issues are hers, i'm not all those things and look i'm twittering again.

constructive stuff please.

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Originally Posted By: are you kidding
like you all said, she saw me as a controling, needy, fruitcake, not there for her emotionally ever, moved from my mom's house to her house, over sexed, self centered, impulsive, mean, unforgiving, good guy.

wife wants to empower herself ok empower herself against what, that chick was spoiled rotten.


Slow down.....

Ok now out of all that up there ^ it's up to you to decide what is real and what isn't and change it.

You don't have to go out of your way and have a counselor suggest or for that matter actually break a patient's confidentiality to figure this sh*t out.

YOU decide AYK.....YOU change for YOU. period.


Don't stand still.
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Originally Posted By: are you kidding
look i'm twittering again.


TWEET!! smile


Don't stand still.
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ROFL...Ayk is twittering again.

It is ok....but in reality your old therapist would contact your wife and make sure the confidentiality waiver between the two of you was still good before contacting you. I would assume that at this point your wife would say "no" it isn't and that would be the end of the conversation.

Do you have a list of YOUR shortcomings? That is a good place to start. When you accept your own shortcomings you will be more successful in conquering them. Some shortcomings you might look at as strengths, but from the outside they are weaknesses. Me for example-I worked to much....did it so the family was financially secure, so I thought it was a strength that I worked so much for the benefit of the family. Reality was that I was not spending good quality time with the kids, getting enough done around the house, taking care of myself, or taking care of my relationship with my wife...all because I worked so much. But working so much was justified in my eyes. Sometimes the things we think are great for everyone are just illusions we want to see.


"Be the changes you want to see in the world"
fisherman #1871423 11/10/09 07:54 PM
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Quote:

she saw me as a controling, needy, fruitcake, not there for her emotionally ever, moved from my mom's house to her house, over sexed, self centered, impulsive, mean, unforgiving, good guy.


Quote:

oh forgot didn't handle the bills


You're new cnslr wants more?


Quote:


most of wifes' issues are hers, i'm not all those things



Good for you.
What of those things are you, that you want to change. F-ing work on those, that is enough.



Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet

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the over sexed has been taken care of:)

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Other than the trust issue where she figured I didn't trust her anymore, did you guys see anything.

Wks ago when I emailed I'm honoring my commitments, she emailed back honor whatever you want, start with your kids.

Her incorrect perception is it took her to kick me out love that term, originally she was asking me to leave so she wouldn't say something she'd regret.

To focus on the kids and myself and she can't make me happy anymore or finish a thought for me.

Anyway I was thinking is she really wanting to make a decision or me just to be a man and husband and start taking care of things.

Go back a couple pages and see what you think,like son's eye appt, groceries and money. I'd pay that anyway, even though she doesn't realize the support I now have to send is for those things. Do I just start paying bills even though she didn't ask?

Read her stuff tell me what you think, can't miss it, it's the one's with the angry tone.

There has not been any constructive talk with her since June. The stuff I get is during her yelling rampage and when something makes sense and is correct I would validate, I also realize I validated too much, i took blame for everything months ago.

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