W just told me she wants out

[TrentC]

Thanks for the help. I have a couple of questions . I had mentioned to W that I wanted her to file seperation papers if she was going to pursue this OM. Push this or ease up?

If she wants to be with the OM, then you need to take charge. If you want to keep her, you have to let her know that an affair or open marriage is not acceptable.

And if she is living in your house while she is canoodling with an OM, that needs to change as well. She gets a choice: she drops him like a hot potato and comes back to you, or she moves out to be with him while you consider filing for D.