Puppy (and all): Just now when I was telling WAW a few things about divorce group last night she said "I never said I was divorcing you". The more I look at things with a fishbowl mentality, the more I see that WAW is really in limboland of her own making. She wants to "have her space" - but not give up the possibility of future reconciliation.
The reality may be that I pushed her out the door by doing such a crap job of dbing in the last 2 months. Now, she thinks the only way she can have space is to physcially create it. So...now it would appear that basic dbing skills applied properly could still result in a bust of this divorce. As I have made some progress in moving forward the last few days, she is suddenly saying things that allow me to know it is not over in her mind. It looks like I db'd well without even knowing it!
I am just starting to realize that with my WAW it takes a combination of nice guy and dbing to make any progress. I know - RobX would say none of us are unique, but unqiue approaches just might be ok???
Puppy - you said my idea of real separation in January is excellent - but do you think I need to be very hard core about it - or can I do the combo thing - not clearly state it to her - but instead just live it? Not be predicatble in the times I will be home - be polite if she is here, but focus on everything other than her? Since actions speak louder than words, must I actually state it or can I just live it and if she says anything deal with it then?
