Well, to say that I am confused is an understatment.
I have IC tomorrow, FC with our oldest D and W tomrrow, and hopefully, MC in the evening. However, my W has yet to call to say she will be there. I should know by the end of the day if she will be.
I don't want a divorce, but I am growing very tired of this setup. Moving in and out of the house every week. Not having a real "home". Only seeing my kids half time. This isn't what having a family is supposed to be like. I know millions of people go through this each year. I know everyone will be okay; but I also KNOW we could fix this marriage; the right way, this time.
I think I have a pretty good shot at being served divorce papers this week, because I pushed her. We will see. We're at a tipping point.
I am focused on tomorrow for right now. I need to talk this through with my IC and see if my wife reconsiders MC or simply goes to file; or even worse, does nothing at all.
Last night I talked to a guy who was divorced after 13 years, similar situation to mine. He said marriage the second time around is much better because he learned how to be married the first time and spent a lot of time in C to learn what he did wrong before remarrying. I certainly intend to do just that if I do end up divorced.
I talked to another guy who was seperated from his wife for 3 months, they were filing for divorce, had assets figured out, etc... Then one day she changed her mind, agreed to C for 6 months and 11 years later they are a picture of happiness, and he says they have never been happier.
So what is in the cards for me? I believe in God and do believe that we don't get more than we can handle; but it does seem like I am getting EVERYTHING that I can handle and I feel like I am about sink.
I know I have decided that I won't file. I plan to tell my W that when we get into heated arguements, we say things we don't mean, which is why I had refused to fight. She may have gotten me to fight last weekend, but I won't do that again. There is no point.
