I ask because filing for bankruptcy is a last resort. Maybe you are correct that you are too far under water, but have you researched other means to avoid bankruptcy?...
Well, can't sign today until I talk to the bankruptcy atty tomorrow because he says if I do qualify for bankruptcy then we need to change the financial statements in the divorce paperwork to reflect that.
On another note, STBX wants to come over Sunday to get the rest of her stuff and take some assorted furniture. I asked her to do that about 3-4 months ago but now it's D-Day she's going to do it finally.
Also, she and the girls were invited to her dads for Thanksgiving dinner but she apparently got dis-invited today. I do know that OM is not welcome there because her dad and stepmom don't approve of her actions. So I suspect that was an issue they couldn't resolve so STBX had a fight with her dad over it and decided she wasn't going.
Instead she is going to visit her grandmother on her mothers side who lives about 3 hours away. Grandma doesn't like what she's done but tolerates it. My daughters are going to meet her there for dinner on friday. They have learned to tolerate OM.
Oh yeah, she asked me if she could have the second fridge we keep in the pantry as she is planning on moving into a bigger place in the spring so she and D14 can have their own rooms. Since her 'support' is only increasing by $300 I don't see how she can afford it unless she lives in a crappy area. She's only been paying $600 for her condo which is about 1/2 what it should be.
Her tone of voice is mostly upbeat, and she keeps thanking me for taking care of the legal issues and will then get defensive if I say anything that could remotely be interpreted as criticism.
She seems excited to finally be getting her divorce.
I used to hang my hat on the hope that eventually my ex would be miserable and realize that she made a mistake.
It's kind of like having a big game against the best team around and hoping it rains so you don't have to play it.
Doesn't change the fact that eventually the game's going to be played...
And it ruins an otherwise decent evening in the process...
It dawned on me at some point that hoping she feels sad for what she lost at some point just meant that I was wasting time enjoying MY life.
Change is hard. There's not a much harder change than life after divorce. But once you accept it and digest it, you realize that your life hasn't ended.
It's just changed.
Change is neither good nor bad. Or maybe I should say that change can be either good or bad. Which one is pretty much up to us.
I know well the financial mess that ending a marriage can bring. You will overcome this and you will succeed and thrive again. You're a strong man, just like I am a strong man. We CAN be knocked down. But we WILL get back up and press on, in many ways stronger than before.
You have a relationship with your two daughters that is to be envied. There's a lot to be thankful for in that, and quite a bit to look forward to. And don't be surprised to discover one day that there may even be more.
Hate to drop cliches, but an ending is also a beginning. I know the rest of YOUR story can and will be a great one.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
I know well the financial mess that ending a marriage can bring. You will overcome this and you will succeed and thrive again. You're a strong man, just like I am a strong man. We CAN be knocked down. But we WILL get back up and press on, in many ways stronger than before.
You have a relationship with your two daughters that is to be envied. There's a lot to be thankful for in that, and quite a bit to look forward to. And don't be surprised to discover one day that there may even be more.
Hate to drop cliches, but an ending is also a beginning. I know the rest of YOUR story can and will be a great one.
Yeah, after the grieving is done it will be much better.
I am sorry to hear about the poor grades. The timing of this could not have come at a worse time.
Who does D14 want to live with? I think she is at a borderline age where she should have some input as to what is best for her. But as Ian has pointed out before, teenagers are known for manipulating things some.
It is probably best to have some discussion with the school counselor.
You're making some hard choices, but doing it with strength.
Kerry, didn't mean to ignore you, and while I believe I see where you are going with that question I am curious.
Yes, I was married once before, a straight WAH with more history than that simple sentence conatins. In all honesty, I'm beating the odds of 80% failure rate.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
