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Originally Posted By: britt54
I'm scared to move stuff out yet.


Don't be. This is his choice to move out of the house. Set him up in the spare bedroom; this is non-destructive, and you can make it a celebration when he moves back into your house and your family.

Originally Posted By: britt54
I wonder what he would say or think?


...OK, do I really need to say it at this point? smile

Originally Posted By: britt54
When its time to officially call it quits we need to sell the house. I can't afford it on my own so I don't want to do anything with his stuff till then. Till its time to box it up for moving day...


But what better way to show him that you're doing fine without him? Maybe this will start him towards that oft-hoped-for day when he comes to his senses.

You said a while back that his life was happy the way it is now. I said that it's time to make him less happy. Heck, invite some of your friends over and make it a painting party! Let him find out through the grapevine...


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
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Originally Posted By: swimmingupstream
That is co-dependant thinking. He should be worried about losing you because you have SO much to offer.


What he said! You need to start thinking of yourself as someone to be wanted and desired. It's his loss if he lets you go.


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
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Posts: 2,757
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I have the wayward room all set up as well. Except all her stuff is in garbage bags. Ready to chuck if needed.


Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul.
unconditional love is awesome!
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Originally Posted By: TrentC
Originally Posted By: swimmingupstream
That is co-dependant thinking. He should be worried about losing you because you have SO much to offer.


What he said! You need to start thinking of yourself as someone to be wanted and desired. It's his loss if he lets you go.

Ditto, ditto and ditto!


Gardener

"My soul, be satisfied with flowers,
With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them
In the one garden you may call your own."
Cyrano deBergerac


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Originally Posted By: TrentC
It's his loss if he lets you go.


Indeed!

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Lll54 Offline OP
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I pray its not too late to turn things around. I pray, I pray, I pray. I do work casually. But in the fall it slows down lots so I only have like 2-3 shifts a month. I do have 7 this month, so that's good. I realize I'm not in the process, I'm far from it. So I'm just gonna have a me night on the couch, and hopefully tomorrow I wake up with some energy to paint the living room. Thanks swimmingupstream.


M: 31
H: 29
Married: 6 yrs
Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old





Separated: Sept. '09
Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09
Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10
Threatening to leave again: July,14
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Originally Posted By: britt54
So I'm just gonna have a me night on the couch, and hopefully tomorrow I wake up with some energy to paint the living room. Thanks swimmingupstream.


Three words: Group painting party.

Invite your female friends over, make some lunch, and have some fun redecorating.


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 582
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I know I have a lot to offer. I feel like my purpose in life is to be a mommy and a wife. I have been reading this book "What is your purpose?" And I've come to the conclusion that, that is mine. So I know he is losing alot. He always used to comment how good of a mom I am and how good of a wife I am. I did everything for the man. I took care of him in every way I knew how. And now I sit here with no husband to take care of and its hard to deal with when i feel like it is my purpose in life. One day I hope he realizes what he's lost. But I'm just scared to death right now that I may have to be that wife to somebody else and I don't want to be. I want to be HIS wife.


M: 31
H: 29
Married: 6 yrs
Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old





Separated: Sept. '09
Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09
Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10
Threatening to leave again: July,14
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 582
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Ya, I would love to Trent. Its a good idea. But I just don't have any friends that are not working and do not have kids. Kids would not be good in the mix of a painting party...hehe. I'll get it done on my own. It will be fine.

Anyone who has small children or any age children and can offer a word of advice. How do you get through the days when you can't see them? I have to children under 3, and it kills me to not be with them. I just want to hold them, and feed them dinner, and bath them, and put them in their jammies, and cuddle them and put them to bed. And I can't. How do you get through that?


M: 31
H: 29
Married: 6 yrs
Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old





Separated: Sept. '09
Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09
Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10
Threatening to leave again: July,14
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 730
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(((britt)))

I can't even imagine being without my babies.

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