Can I save my marriage?

[TrentC]

Trent, what do you mean about not believing what he says right now? What do you believe then? How do you know what to believe and what not to believe. If I don't believe the bad or the good then I'm in a rut.

The rest of the quote is "...and only half of what they do." Which ties in neatly with why we say that your actions are what's important.

When he says something that's hurtful, tell him that you understand why he feels that way. Tell yourself that he's only saying that because he's hurting, or confused, and doesn't know what to do.

When he says something positive, take it for what it is and nothing more. If all else fails, say "thank you". Don't read any intentions into it.

There will come a point where you will know when he starts to be honest with himself, and you. You'll start hearing a lot less of the negative talk -- because it doesn't work any more -- and more of the questioning or positive talk.