After a while I went to her and told her if she ever spoke to me that way again (where the kids may have heard) I would kick her ass to the curb. I will not stand to be treated that way.
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Not long afterwards I got a voice mail apology for her comment and behavior (see above).
Boundary- your behavior will have consequences = positive, healthy results
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But she also tried to explain how the OM at church actually helps her, as he answers questions that she has. She doesn't need him there, but she likes when he is. She doesn't expect me to understand that.
I told her she's just rationalizing but she said it's not that at all with regard to church.
Of course it wouldn't be, if the relationship with the OM hadn't crossed the line. She just doesn't get the fact that ANY contact is infidelity,
No boundary = unhealthy realtionship
Why can she speak to you in a way you don't like you will "kick her to the curb" but if she is being unfaithful it's OK because you are Catholic and won't divorce her? You send confusing messages to your wife. She's right, are you being a good husband?
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She just doesn't get the fact that ANY contact is infidelity, no matter what the nature of it is.
Do you really believe that? Your actions don't say so. That's why your wife doesn't take you seriously. You "rationalized" away all your respect from your wife.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
