Tell us what you learned from your experience last night. Have you gained any new perspective on where your W was coming from? Have you gained any new perspective on yourself and your situation?
CG,
I don't condone what happened last night. Like I said, I am ashamed to even admit it. But I am being honest. I will say this, if me and W had not been the way we have been for the past year, I would never have been drawn into this as I was always 100% faithful to her and made sure I never allowed myself to be put in a situation where this could happen.
That being said, yes, I do see the high of another person that just totally draws you into them. But also like I said, I am struggling with it today because I know it is wrong. Ultimately it will not work out because I can't drop my W for someone else. But it was a real high last night. It is a moral issue for me that I am struggling with. I really liked her. But I know that this is not something I can pursue. At the same time, I know that if I continue to go out with her, she will just draw me in closer and I know my guards will drop around her and that is not something I want to happen.
Like I said, I am struggling emotionally because of this.
In some ways, I can understand what my W felt as our R was not where it should have been for her. In other ways, I still don't condone it because I know this would never have happened if we were together.
It is a tough struggle right now.
SM, no I did not open mouth kiss her.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
