You are gaining a deeper awareness of your ambition and the yet unexplored land that lies ahead of you. But before you go any further I suggest you be willing to question your own wounds surrounding any mistrust within a relationship. Could it be that the depth of your desire for someone or something scares even you? No doubt this is leveling the playing field in your life. But this is an important balancing of power within your deepest commitments. There are relationships whose potential you have barely explored the tip of. If you can trust and recognize another’s gifts and what they have to offer, you could stand to reap tangible and emotional rewards of a partnership. You need not fear losing control or your position. This is only teaching you a lesson in true depth, honesty and commitment."
xxx
Bworl, with respect, I have to point out that I also asked my now returned WAS to talk to his ow, in the early weeks of our reconciliation. Partly for her sake (because I felt for her getting hurt, to explain it wasnt her fault, that he just never got over me), partly so she wouldnt be a shadow on our R (as their work organisations are 'partners' so potential to be in contact). He refused, for the exact same reasons Kalni's H has given. I accepted those reasons as truth of how he really felt and also valid. My fixation on ow is understandable, but MY problem. It didnt mean he didnt want me back, wasnt sincere, didnt love me or was only focused on himself. Quite the contrary. As he said, he had moved on and he didnt want to go back and have to answer to her. It was over, it wasnt about her anymore, but about me and him now.
I accepted his answers, respected his reasons and TRUSTED him that it was over and he was done (yes, it IS possible when affairs end for the WAS to be done), but the R was shorter than K's H, so its ok K if YOU need more time to feel comfortable enough to let it go and not allow ow anymore power to harm this M.
Love Al xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
