Thanks for the boot in the butt, just what I needed. This is where I come to vent so if you bear with me, I will continue.
Ya'll know how the snooping starts, it is because we have been the feeling something is being hidden. It was not for any malicious motive. It's self-defense. I am an honest person so this really bothers me. No , I don't want to tell him I had e-mail password because at this point it would do no good at all. That would not be constructive in the rebuilding process. When we talk again I will let him know I want to see his accounts. That will probably be a bone of contention and I doubt he would agree. On one hand I am glad he changed his password because what I have read is etched in my heart. On the other hand, well, you know, it is as if I am looking for affirmation that his "activities" are over because his word is not good enough right now. This is so hard.
I guess I should be grateful he wants to read DB, that he is willing to go counselling and that he says he doesn't want to divorce. I am such a cynic. I guess what I want is a heartfelt apology and complete confession and an instant fix. In reality, this day to day stuff is work and we're both still here willing to work.
Annie, you said to build the marriage on honesty and openess and the trust will come later, pretty profound, girl. I really hope you're right. And those fluffy white clouds, well that thought will bring to mind my friend Tempest who is very wise and supportive. Thanks ya'll.
