Still getting nowhere fast....

[TrentC]

My H has not been breaking stuff anymore but now he is on to the next thing that is crazy and hurtful. Just about everytime that I talk to him now, and we end up arguing about something, I get told to shut the f*** up, to go f*** myself, or to f*** off. Not sure where this new behavior has come from. Sure it is better than breaking my stuff to a point but it is still just as hurtful.

And so why is this a relationship you are trying to save? it sounds like he is trying his level best to make you miserable until you give in to what he wants.

Money is a big issue. My girls are the other issue. And I can probably give a list of ten more reasons why I am not ready to give up, move out, or get a divorce. None of my excuses are very good though. I don't have anything but a part time job that woudl barely make ends meet and I would not be able to put enough food on the table, clothe my girls, get all the things that they needed, pay rent and the utilities, and keep all the other bills at bay to. I hardly have any money in the savings accounts, at least not enough to sustain us long enough. Also, I am afraid that if I leave and I am struggling, then my daughters real dads could find out about it and take me back to court to get my girls. If that were to happen and I can't pay for a lawyer and then I lost my girls because I can't provide for them, then I would be devestated.

So you are going to stay around in a loveless, abusive relationship? How does that benefit your girls?

There are plenty of resources to help single mothers and abused spouses. They exist for a reason. Look into them.

And I don't know about the fathers of your girls, but I think if they found out what you were living with now, they wouldn't be too happy either.

I think I am second guessing alot about me, myself, and I right now. I don't know what I want, where I want to be, or if I want to be with him anymore.

But this is a good thing. Once you know the answers to those questions, you will know what to do.

Beleive me -- there are plenty of guys out there who would treat you right and not want to share you with anyone, or degrade you the way your H seems to want to.