Recovering yourself from all this

[frank_D]

Wanna know what is so damn beautiful about those cards you've been delt??

YOU get to decide what type of hand you're holding. YOU get to determine how to play them.

Yeah, just wondering how long before the hurt goes away.

Hey Jack, how long was your W's affair? Just wondering. My STBX is coming up on 14 months. She sometimes seems unhappy about her life and OM is not a 'man' per se, more of a weak willed man-boy.

Just wondering.

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Why are you wondering Frank?

[Drew]

My two cents: Two nights ago I went to my youngest's (S7) parent-teacher conference. Yes, XW was there also. The teacher's parting comment - You know, he's just a really, really happy kid.

Divorce doesn't have to be an end or a death sentence. It's all in how you play the cards you're dealt.

Strength and honor, Frank.

[frank_D]

Why are you wondering Frank?

Stupidly comparing notes I guess.

[smith18]

Frank -

Do you really want this guy to pay you a visit?

At times you seem like you want to move on, but yet you keep pondering about your ex wife. Stop it!!!!

Quit living in the past of what once was. You wife is lost and it does not matter why. She is a slut. She shacks up with losers. You can do so much better.

[frank_D]

Divorce doesn't have to be an end or a death sentence. It's all in how you play the cards you're dealt.

Strength and honor, Frank.

I guess for me it's the confusion that comes from some of her comments to me. Sometimes it seems like she is missing the 'family life'. Sometimes I think she misses talking to me because I avoid talking to her.

I know that she's not good for me because she hasn't faced her own demons, instead applied a band aid in the form of OM, divorce, etc.

I do need to heal and live life without her in it. For my own sake and that of my daughters. It's really hitting me hard today. I'm an overly sensitive person.

[frank_D]

Quit living in the past of what once was. You wife is lost and it does not matter why. She is a slut. She shacks up with losers. You can do so much better.

Yeah, well she'd say that my depression and drinking problems justify her trying to find happiness elsewhere.

Everyone has their perceptions. But I do agree she has made the poorest choices possible in our situation.

[Drew]

Frank,

Healing takes time. You're gonna have good days and bad days. No getting around it. Eventually, the good days will start to outnumber the bad.

Hang in there. Life gets better if you let it. Trust me.

[frank_D]

Hang in there. Life gets better if you let it. Trust me.

Thanks Drew

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Drew and Kerry are both fantastic examples to aim for Frank.

I am going to suppose here.

I am also not trying to be mean with you, this is just what I feel from what you are currently writing.

That right now, you're hoping that she notices the pain blanket you have wrapped yourself up in and it makes her re-think what she is doing.

If we are going to suffer, we can suffer with quiet dignity; or we can suffer looking for attention.

We can also choose not to suffer.

I worry, truely about your cycles, and your seeming determination to suffer.