Don't worry about the reconciliation fantasies. Remeber why you came to this forum. What has helped me is the fact that I understand that my old marriage for my wife is dead and gone and she doesn't want to be there anymore. That also means if it is dead for her it is dead for us and for me. This does provide me with the opportunity to start over and learn what is important to her.
I may be mind reading here but she has not left, she is reaching out to you through emails. Does she still hope. I think so. Does she still care. I think so. But she can't go back to something that is dead and gone. She needs you more than ever to lead her out of this place of mourning. She can't be lead by how you feel she needs to be lead. Only how she want's to be lead.
She will only come back when there is something there that she wants to come back to. She loves you. She wants you to be the man she needs you to be and not the man you told her she needed. More prayers. Good luck.
JJ
H:37 W:34 D11,S8,S6 Together 19 years M:10 Bomb:4/09
