Sandi and Mishka thanks for the thoughts. I agree with both. Mishka, we went through counseling at the time, then had the two boys afterwards. We never agreed to not bring it up - but I am begining to think that it was the pink elephant in the room for the last 14 years because it was never discussed Ever.

Sandi, her parents did know about it , but not at the time it occured. Since then all family members know because I told them. However, that was this summer. I decided I did not want anything to be hidden. I am nt proud of what happend and asked for forgiveness from all(including God). From what I am reading here, she may NEVER have forgiven me..

Now, at this point, what shoudl I do, if anything? I am tired of her bringinng up the name. The person has never entered my mind again. When it was done, it was over for me. I never looked back except to regret the pain I caused.

ME 41, Her 41
M 18.5 years
T 19.5 years
s - 12, 10
Bomb 7/12/09
Inhouse Seperation 7/13/09 - 10/1/09
She moved out 10/1/09 - present