The WAW rang me in work to help the boys settle down and sleep as they get upset sleeping away from the home.

Then when the WAW got back on the phone she tells me during our conversation that I have not been honest to her through the separation - this is one of the issues she has, That I avoid telling her hurtful things, and it is true.
I asked for an example but also asked for her to remember that we are separated and that she has not been forthcoming with the truth herself.

I knew it would be about xmas at her D.
And it was.
She told me that she knew of my plans 2 weeks before she brought it into the open.
I explained that I did not evade the truth nor tell any lies, just that there was never the right time to tell her and I knew she would be hurt by it.

The conversation got deeper and turned onto,
She said;
She never wanted to leave me.
Never wanted to hurt me.
Never wanted to hurt the boys.

She knows that the current setup is hurting the boys, herself and me.
She said that all she ever wanted to do was to make me happy, and that she had tried for years to get through to me. But all I did was push her away by not listening to her and giving her emotional support.

I agreed to all my failings.

She said that she does not want to stay at her Brothers.
She says she wants to be at home, but that it still stings.
She said she wants to communicate fully with me.
I explained that being separated makes us double guess everything and look for the hidden meaning in everything.

I explained that I need her to ask me directly for what she wants, and if she has to use a 4x2 on my head.
She agreed that blokes need to be told directly and can not take a hint.

She explained that she never wanted to move out.
She explained that she had tried for years to get through to me.

I said perhaps I needed her drastic action to wake me up
(I know this could be seen as giving her justification for her leaving, but it was a chance to say I needed to change and that I have done so)

I confessed to all my sins.
She confessed to all her sins and not being perfect.

She kept saying that she did not want to leave me and that it is hurting everyone.

I asked her not to contact the EA in front of me and she agreed - another boundary set.

It was a conversation full of straight talking.
It felt genuine.
It felt like she was close to coming home, but she did say that she did not want to come home yet and that it still stings.

I think we have had a conversation along these lines before.
I want to see the actions not just words.
Still no mention of D at all.
She spoke a lot about how she wants to come back and how much it is hurting everyone.

All she has to do is give me the call and I will pick her up.

But the facts are that she is not home yet - and this may be just typical WAW spouting.
But a heck of a lot was said as the conversation was over 45 mins long.
And it ALL felt positive.

Regards,
Gyn



Cause all of the stars,
Have faded away,
Just try not to worry,
You'll see them someday.
Take what you need,
And be on your way and,
Stop crying your heart out.