K, so I need some clarification. I have read DB and the whole holding off the "R" talk. Does anybody have any proven success at this? I'm completely just needing some honest clarification on this. I understand it is part of the process, but I just don't quite understand why? And if it works? thanks to anybody that can clarify this for me!
B54, You posted this over on Sad Girls thread.
If you talk about the R now what comes up? All the things you have done wrong and now you are changing but's it's too little too late. Why couldn't you have done that before when it would have mattered? So just show the changes, show true giving and filling their love buckets, really listen, validate, take care of yourself, and be consiistent in your changes and growth. You do all of these things for your benefit. "Love your neighbor as yourself." Eventually R talks will come up but you want them after you are secure in your new and improved self. You will backslide but you want to be higher up the mountain when it happens. R talks will keep you stuck in a hole when you are starting out.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
