Keep Your Hands Offa My Mojo

[Kettricken]

I dunno, guys. I can definitely see the point of projecting confidence in that circumstance, for sure ... but an external smile seems to be rife with interpretational perils. For instance:

"He's smiling. He must not really be that pissed. I don't have to take this seriously."

I was watching this show the other day featuring a "child behavior expert" (fascinating to childless me), and she said something I thought was really interesting, to a mother: "How can you expect them to take you seriously when you are speaking softly and smiling? Lower your tone of voice and sound serious!"

Not intending to compare wives to children, 'cause obviously THAT ain't me, but the concept may still apply......


"He's smiling. He's trying to placate me. Weakness. Load photon torpedos!"


"He's smiling, OMG he's smug. He must not take me seriously at all! This is WAR!!!!"

Seriously, a smug, condescending smile? I thought this was about drawing appropriate boundaries with a person you claim to love (otherwise, why DB at all?) Arrogance has no place there, nor does an adversarial stance, as O'Dog so eloquently pointed out (Amen, brother!). If such conversations devolve into games to be won, IMHO, you've already lost the war inside your own head.