Slept with XH, help!!

[Augtan]

Wow! This is getting good, LOL!! I believe in MLC from all the research I have done and how it matches my XH behavior to a T!! And, honestly my XH changed nearly overnight, he claims now he was unhappy before, but there were no signs and he still did all he had done for years the same (called me the "love of his life" everyday, called me 5 times a day, was interacting with me and the kids like always, etc.), then like an alien abduction that man was gone. So, I don't really believe he was unhappy for months or whatever before he "changed". It was just what he needed to say to convince himself what he was doing was ok. We all know they blame us for everything and make excuses for all their lies and deceptions, and this was one of my XH's.

I do think there are spouses that are not in MLC and walk away without looking back, without regret, get re-married etc. But, their behaviors are completely different. That is why some are MLC, some are WAS, some are just people who want a divorce for whatever reason (abuse, drinking, drugs, money issues, etc.) My XH is searching, he is searching for answers to all his pain and agnony, I can see it, and hear it. He is not just moving on and happy as a clam!!

I do have an update that is interesting to me. I spoke to the real estate agent for our house in GA yesterday for the first time. I just had no reason to really speak to him before now, cause XH was there and doing most of it. But, there was an offer I hadn't been informed of and called him. Anyway, it was a pure God moment! He is an incredible person. I was very upset when I called him because I had been left out of the loop on things. I told him, nicely, why I was so upset and he listened, then said he needed to share something with me. It is a long story, but basiclly he said a few months ago he invited my XH to church, he could see XH was a very lost soul, very depressed, seemed just blank. He said that a few years ago he and his wife were very unhappy, in short, they both ended up at church and found their way back to happiness. So, when he saw XH so bad off he invited him to church. I had tried to get XH to church for years, he would never go!! Well, a few weeks after he asked my XH, XH e-mailed him and asked the time of the services and if the realtor would meet him there. HE WENT TO CHURCH!! I started crying when he told me this!! We went on to talk for over an hour about so many things, and he told me that he is going to reach out to XH again and see what happens. They are doing a series at the church about family and wants XH to come or ask him to watch it online. I have no hope for anything to come from it, but even if it gets XH to be a better Dad, that is enough for me!! And, that coupled with what I saw when he was up here, and the fact he has started C, who knows what is going on with XH. He is searching and that is a good thing.

I went out with friends last night and had a blast! We are all divorced and supporting each other. I am working hard on GLA for ME and not all about my kids. I have not had any contact with XH about anything but stuff about the house and it was all via e-mail!

One of my good friends in GA gave me a wooden angle that say "Never lose Hope" right after Bomb in 2007! I will live by that for the rest of my life! I also think "don't return evil with evil" whenever when I think about OW!! Thanks again to everyone for caring about me so much as to post and help me. It means a lot to me and whether I like what I am reading or not it is all good and makes me think!

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