My story, About 6 years ago I came home from a business trip to find my wife had moved out of the house. There where several factors that led up to this but the basic causes of it where me and in particular my drinking and drug use. Refuses to do any type of marriage counselling. I joined a 12 step program sobered up and my wife moved back into the house. She got pregnant and we had a baby. A little fast forward found us moving into a house. Unfortunately I had a slip with drugs and alcohol and went back to my lying ways. This all came to light about 3 months before our daughter was born. My wife really wanted to leave then but for obvious reasons couldn’t. Again I joined a 12 step group and sobered up and have been sober for 3 years ever since then. About 15 months ago the bomb hits, “I don’t like you I am leaving”. A lot of crying and begging on my part (I know I know). She decides to stay. We now start throwing a lot of money around. She has some cosmetic surgery and starts to feel better about her body, things are improving. It also comes out in the wash she is having “dirty chat” with someone on Facebook and is very remorseful about it. We agree the past is the past and try to move on. Also refuses marriage counselling About a year after that I lie about the stupidest thing I mean really stupid small but still a lie. She wants to break up. She stays basically for the kids she stays. Again refuses marriage counselling. We have huge communication issues when things get heated and it is very dysfunctional between both of us. 2 months later on our anniversary she says she is not happy and is leaving. She talks herself out of it and stays. It also comes out she wants to sell our house and move to a new town. I agree so we sell the house very quickly and buy a new house. No to marriage counselling. 1 month until we make a supposed “new start” and I start to notice sex dries up, “I love you” is replaced with “me too”, and hugs are more like buddies do. Oh man it’s starting again! I ask what’s up is everything okay and am met with anger. For 2 weeks when I start the conversation I am met with anger. Sunday night I get pissed off and say we need to talk about this now. A fairly big argument starts and we go on for a while. It ends with “I don’t really like you and never have” from her. She now says I broke up with her when really all I did was ask for a change to our relationship. I have made a lot of changes over the years (I not saying I am perfect) but really she blames me for everything and feels she has little to improve on. So in 4 weeks we are supposed to move to our dream house in our dream town to make a new start. She is adamant she wants to split up. I ask her to give it six more months with marriage counselling and a dedicated date night to spend some quality time with each other (which we never do). No is the answer. Arrgg! I do not want this to happen. I have not always been the greatest guy. But it does take two. Do I have the right to ask for this not to end? I have 3 and 6 yr old whom I love very much and I know this will tear them apart. I will post more on the last 4 days events later.
