Stronger..you have helped me more than you will EVER know! You are a strong and wonderful person and I know good things will happen to you in your life! I am sorry you have to go through this! I wish you the best. I wish you would stay around because your advice is PRICELESS! Read other posts that say..just because there are divorce proceedings many have stopped before it got to that point. It is not over until it is over. Hang in there! Just know you have support here! You are WONDERFUL and honestly you have helped me change my life!
Dittos to what everybody else had said. Take care of yourself!
Me - 30, H - 32 T - 10, M - 6, D - 1 DD#1 - 4, DD#2 - 2 on/off OW 4/09 - sometime Summer 2010 (Told me about OW 4/10) Separated 6/11/09, divorced 8/4/10, trying again 9/2011
Hi All, Just a quick update because yes, it's probably crappy of me to just fall off the boards.... We are divorcing. He's very much done. I'm at a point where he's villanized me so completely to close friends and family I can't compete. He has completely re-written history and there's nothing I can do about it. Also, he's maintained contact with ex-OW, so I'm also competing with a ghost, very hard to do.
We are going to have the hearing sometime in late January. In the meantime, I hope to sell the house. As of now, H thinks he can come and go here as he pleases which is very infuriating.
I'm going to cut off contact as much as possible after this weekend. We have commitments that were made a little while back that I intend to keep, including a friend's child's first birthday. Then I'm going to a happy hour, then to a special party to meet other singles in town. Then Sunday is H's birthday and a friend of ours planned a little something at her place for him. After that, Monday's and Wednesday's he will have S until 8 at night and every other weekend. I will not be there to help him cover his weekends or evenings unless it's work related since we both need our jobs. I will not cover for golf or socializing any longer.
Oh and he ran up the credit cards again, but said I would not be responsible and will put it in the D decree.
One minute I'm ok, over it. One minute I really think about this and what is about to happen. I'm trying to stick more to being ok and moving forward, one step at a time.
Just be careful with the single scene, you're going to be a bit raw and vulnerable. You stand a chance of hurting yourself, and someone who doesn't deserve it if you find you're not ready.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Do be careful if you start dating. My personal rule of thumb has always been to give myself 2 months for every year. It has helped me gain clarity for myself.
I have heard of folks coming back from the brink. Every sitch and circumstance is different. In the cases I'm most closely associated with (not from this bb) it was a witnessing of changes and the realization of what would be lost in oneself to not look further and explore reconciliation.
