"Home Improvements"

[sage]

I also think that in some ways we need to "behave our way" to success...so maybe it starts with just moderating how we act out our emotions (Duct Tape anyone??? )

But ultimately it must move to a deeper awareness of how we are responsible for our own emotions and can, with mindfulness and practise, learn NOT to feed the ones that do harm.

Interesting, no?

Shiny

Shiny -

It really has been both paths for me as you might expect...at times...just "behaving" in the right way even with the undercurrent and at other times...working on identifying and stopping the negatives.

I need to also add a third category...when I behave in a way that I'm not proud of ... at least now I find that I'm aware of it and make atonement where I can. When I can't atone, I try to at least use it as a means to a deeper practice.

Now this may not make sense to ANYONE but me but I did have an enlightening moment this AM in traffic...

I find that I'm much more able lately to be courteous to others in traffic when I WANT to be...I'm the one who'll wave you in, stop so you can turn, slow down or speed up to make it easier for you. I still REALLY struggle, though, when I WANT someone to be courteous to me and they aren't. when the refuse to let me merge or could make it easier for me (with no impact on them) and they don't.

This morning I was merging into a very heavy traffic pattern and the guy ON the highway wouldn't let me in. I felt really angry, wanted to give him the finger, etc. I caught myself and looked at my anger and had an insight "hey, this isn't about me". Not in the "screw him, he must be a jerk, etc" way but in the "not everything is about me" way....I think this will be GREAT practice for me to apply to home, m, R, etc.

I have the audiotape of Destructive Emotions in my car! Right now I'm listening to "how to practice".

Sage