Well, it was a great lunch. We stopped somewhere for desert after too. I walked them to the car and put D2 in. Had a nice long gaze and kiss (real kiss). She said she loved me. I reciprocated. She said that she'd see me tonight at MC (I have to meet her there because of work). I said, "ya I'm sure it will be just as much fun". She said "We're a team". I told her that she'd "never be alone again"...re: her txt earlier. She said thank you.
What a roller coaster this is. I need to piece this back together. I really wish she didn't cheat on me but I feel like it was this big cry for help and way to feel like she's gotten even with me for the years I've neglected her and not met her needs. I'm going to struggle to get passed it but think I'll be able to fine if we work together. Today could either be the pivotal moment or just a good day in a long long road to recovery. Either way I'll take it and am happy to go into MC on this high note because I know it's going to be a stressful night.
Oh, she also told me she canceled on the band she was supposed to sing with (we were going to get a babysitter and do our separate things Friday night). The most telling sign is when I look her in the eye's today. It's her. It's my W looking right back at me with love.
And...real time news...just got a txt..."Btw, that kiss was amazing"
I feel like I'm being punked and Ashton Kutcher it about to jump in and punch me in the gut or something.
Anyway, I need to get off this site for the day and get some work done. All of these stories and advice have given me alot of perspective and things I need to work on myself. I hope I can just keep the positive changes going.
Me: 30 W: 29 D: 20 months M: 5 years T: 6.5 years ILYBNILWY and want to separate: 10/5/2009
