Last night I was reading and posting on SOMEONE'S thread about the changes and goals we're doing and whether they reflect surface physical/behavioural changes or somed deeper more lasting internal changes.
In reading more of "Destructive Emotions" today, some Buddhist philosophy struck me.
They were talking about how in Western Psychotherapy most of the changes are behavioural...that is people may still FEEL angry, anxious or whatever (even though it may be toned down some) but they learn to ACT on it differently...and often with very good results!
But in the Buddhist way, it is much better to back further in the process of emotion...to not only catch the trigger, but the JUDGEMENTS we make that lead us to destructive feelings.
For example going to the spark of it all...what we SAY to ourselves about a situation..."He's ignoring me..." and LET GO of that judgement BEFORE it even has a chance to arouse negative emotions.
I also think that in some ways we need to "behave our way" to success...so maybe it starts with just moderating how we act out our emotions (Duct Tape anyone??? )
But ultimately it must move to a deeper awareness of how we are responsible for our own emotions and can, with mindfulness and practise, learn NOT to feed the ones that do harm.
)