? for people who have gone to Retrouvaille

[Trixi]

Hi Ted-
thanks for stopping in- and all prayers are VERY welcome!!

H was sick with the flu over the weekend so we didn't go to the second post session. To say I was bummed would be an understatement. They offered to teleconference us in, but he didn't feel like it. So, I guess they recorded it for us and are mailing it. So, I didn't see him all weekend and just had brief text exchanges.

Last night he came over and he did ask if I knew where the recording was.(ie had they mailed it? what about doing an FTP?) And we sort of read thru the parts that we missed..more like skimmed. He asked me to call our Lifeline couple and find out what we should do, since we are now behind.

He was so obviously happy to see me. So, I was being my usual self and he goes "Why are you SO good to me? I've been a real jerk. I don't understand you." I told him it was because I loved him. Again he said that he's been thinking about what a jerk he's been; that in some ways he's happy that I've been sticking it out and other ways he's mad at me. The underlying theme was "this is complicated now. I'm so confused. I don't know what to do with you." I asked why it was complicated 'now' and he said because if he just would have cut things off two years ago, we'd be moved on; now we're more attached.

The look on his face, love in his eyes is the reason I keep trying. Too bad he always pulls back.

So, again, he says that we're doing retro to try to figure this out. OH! He did say that there is a part of him that "doesn't want to 'give in'/concede." He said it sort of joking, but when I asked if he was serious he said that there was definitely a part of him that felt that way.

I hope that there is something in retro that deals with that sort of thing.