Now that's creative thinking , Being Me! Well, mission accomplished on the homefront. STBX and I were like a well oiled machine, the kid didn't stand a chance. I hit her with my stats and anecdotes and we did lots of "we love you" s and she actually admitted to doing the act. During tears, she apologized for lying to us and abusing our trust and promised that it would not happen again, she said she would not have sex with him again. We talked about how to make that happen and told her that they were no longer allowed to spend time together at either of our homes unsupervised. STBX said "we are going back a step until you earn our trust again" So it ended with alot of hugging, two parents hugging and loving their child. I said "you've experimented, you made a mistake and now it's time to move on and not repeat those mistakes" So Saturday night bf is coming over to STBX's to help D hand out candy, I will be the host as STBX will not be home. I told her that he is still welcome to come and that I would try hard not to beat the snot out of him. D looked at me eyes wide until I said "you realize I'm joking, right?" So that's that...for now. Thanks for your support folks. The plan went off without a hitch. It was a good night.
Thanks Donna. Well, this weeks crisis is that STBX's mother needs heart surgery and therefore STBX will be flying off any day now to be with her and Whatis will be taking the kids for at least two weeks. Let's see last week it was D having sex, the week before brother losing his job (and needing support from,you guessed it, Whatis)and for the month and a half before that it was best friends W leaving him. Hey, and just prior to all this it was 3.5 months of virus fighting. Yes, every time I think the week coming up will be some kind of emotional break something else pops up. Lord, give me strength! I was pretty impressed with myself the last two weeks because I handled things without anxiety taking over. I'm starting to tire though. Thank goodness for my massage tomorrow. OK, bitching time is over. Thanks for listening Dbers!
Has anybody out there ever tried Cognitive Behavioural Therapy? I'm thinking this might be something that would help me deal with this unending anxiety saga. The virus seems to have knocked me down and I'm having a tough time getting back on track. Of course, the endless stresses lately have not helped. Anybody out there ever gone this route? How did it work out for you? Thanks. Also, my present shrink is not a CB therapist but I'm sure she'd refer me to one if I asked.
Hi OT! I think that was the book the STBX's shrink gave her a number of years ago to read and she really did reinvent her life As far as the virus I mentioned, the symptoms have been gone for six weeks or so, I'm just damn tired and every time I turn around a new crisis hits. During the virus I was continually running on adrenalin and my anxiety started to raise it's ugly head. Now that the virus is gone my brain is continuing to function in the overthinking mode and it's hard to turn off. I find myself overly anxious about things that I was concerned about before but would only get a twinge of anxiety when I pondered them, now the reaction seems so much stronger. I'm thinking I need to re-wire something somewhere as my mind has found a new habit...worry! I think STBX still has that book in the basement I'll check it out next time I'm there. She leaves for China on Friday and it'll be me and the kids for 2.5 weeks. Thanks for dropping by, OT.
Whatis did his first Yoga workout in a long time last night. I was tired but put on the DVD, cleared the floor, layed down my mat and did 40 minutes and really enjoyed it. I could feel tension in so many places I wasn't really aware were so tight. My shoulders and arms feel much better today, no aches or pains. STBX phoned just as I finished and I told her what I'd been doing and she said "that's great! Now, you just need to practise self discipline to keep it up" She 's mentioned to me a number of times how "she" would like to see me get into physical activity again. So we're both happy for the moment! I'm going to try and do this three or four nights per week and hopefully it will make a big difference in the way I've been feeling both physically and emotionally these days. Massages are great but I have do some of the work too! Btw, STBX leaves for China tonight and I said I'd try to drop by before she leaves (I have to pick up oldest D at her place)but I told her that if I didn't make it that she should give her mom my love and tell her that I'm praying for her. STBX thanked me for taking the kids for the next two weeks. That's it for now Dbers. Have a great afternoon. Also, the book and DVD I'm using is called "Holy Yoga" and it's a Christian rendition of Yoga. I very much liked the first class as the postures are a workout but not too difficult to follow even if you haven't much Yoga experience. We'll try class 2 tonight...I hope!
Here is the Whatis update. Could a week go by without something happening? Of course not! This week I have the stomach flu. I've been off two of the past three days, yesterday I thought I'd made an amazing recovery and went to work all day with no problems but today I'm yakking and tired as can be. So much for the 24 hour bug. I also decided earlier this week to start on the AD's and am taking them at half dose, my doctor says to do that for two weeks and then we'll look at going to a full dosage. He says I'm on a "candy dose" right now. Hey, if half a dose gets me through then that's all I'll need. So far, no side effects but then I'm tired from the flu so how would I really know anyway We're also going to do some further blood work in a week or two to rule out any other less likely causes for my fatigue. He's using words like Chronic Fatigue Syndrome now and when I questioned him on that he said "You know us doctors, when we come across something we don't know we throw a label at it!" Who really knows what's wrong with me! I've also found a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist and I'm going to see her next week to discuss my situation and a treatment plan. If I like her and the plan I'll work with her. I spoke to my regular therapist on the phone today (yes, I've seen her five times, but I've known her on and off for almost twenty years) to get her input and she thinks Cognitive therapy would be helpful in dealing with the misattributions I make such as "I feel weak therefore I am weak". I've found myself, due to tiredness, being less able to shut down some of these silly thoughts I worry about. It's funny because I sat down today, while reading an Albert Ellis book, and wrote down some of my fears/anxieties and they are all absolutely ridiculous!!!! Every one of these things I have faced in the past and dealt with capably, so why the anxiety now? Strange thing the mind. Anyway, that's my update...got to go pick up D12 from gymnastics now. Later Dbers.
