I didnt say anything about our R but Im sure confused!
So is she.
Let her stew on it for a while. If you press her for details, you will push her away. If you don't, she may drift back to you a bit.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
I have definitely learned in my short 5 weeks journey not to over analyze and wonder till you make yourself sick about what she is thinking. My H constantly throws mixed signals at me every 4-5 minutes. Its confusing as hell. But hey, we can't read their minds, we can't decipher what they are thinking or feeling. Actions speak louder than words. Remember that.
M: 31 H: 29 Married: 6 yrs Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old
Separated: Sept. '09 Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09 Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10 Threatening to leave again: July,14
I have definitely learned in my short 5 weeks journey not to over analyze and wonder till you make yourself sick about what she is thinking. My H constantly throws mixed signals at me every 4-5 minutes. Its confusing as hell. But hey, we can't read their minds, we can't decipher what they are thinking or feeling. Actions speak louder than words. Remember that.
Congratulations! You have now joined me in preaching this stuff better than we practice it.
((britt54))
I keed, I keed...
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
I feel like I will never be able to practice as well as I think I can preach. I look at my sitch from the outside in, and laugh at myself and the way I behave and go about things, and think. But it doesn't seem to get me to practice any better.
M: 31 H: 29 Married: 6 yrs Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old
Separated: Sept. '09 Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09 Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10 Threatening to leave again: July,14
I feel like I will never be able to practice as well as I think I can preach.
None of us do. That's what makes this group so great; we keep each other honest without being too harsh on each other.
*not looking at Coach, robx, and PDT at the moment*
Originally Posted By: britt54
I look at my sitch from the outside in, and laugh at myself and the way I behave and go about things, and think. But it doesn't seem to get me to practice any better.
Like I said early on -- I feel like you're about 2-3 weeks behind me on my path. Just keep plugging away at it, day by day.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
Well the roller coaster continues. w just came back by to pick up d. After what had transpired this morning I didnt know what to exspect. She didnt have much to say and acted very standoff-ish. What a change from this morning. Based upon all I read out in the forums. Very Commen..Right and then she offered to switch weekends if Im not feeling up to it.Any thoughts?
Me 39 W 33 Married 7yrs Together 10 2 children 3 and 1 Says"She's moving on with her life"
Yea. Next time just thank her for her support that day and leave it at that. Smile and look into her eyes when you say it. Be very upbeat about it. But make the thank you quick and give her 100% attention when you say it. I believe that this is how you truely feel. The coming together and stand-offish should not matter. What should truely matter is that she was still there. Read no more nor less into it. Take a gift when it is freely given and give thanks for that gift.
And if you do not feel up to it. Switch weekends. Again another thoughtful gift. Hell, if I switched weekends I would center the conversation around getting some comfort food from her for the switch. I would say it in a joking manor and smile, maybe even laugh. If she brings some comfort food then take it as a thoughtful gift again. And thank her. If she does not get take out....
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
Im frustrated and very angry today. Keep in mind im on alot of different meds and my medical issues oue very serious. I took cuuters advise and thanked and told her how much I appreciated her stopping by and her flexibility with the kids. Her response via text was how worried she was about me and make sure I follow all doctors instructions and added now I should know why she was so bitchy after she had the babies. I empathizied with her and then asked because I cant drive right now if she would be willing to take me to my appt today. She said very short via text" No i cant take you but I hope all is okay" Im very angry,pissed,upset. The doctor is very concerned and i cant believe with as serious as this might be she cant be there to help me. Maybe im better off just letting this marriage end. She really doesnt care about me anymore? What am I doing trying to hang on to something that isnt there?
Me 39 W 33 Married 7yrs Together 10 2 children 3 and 1 Says"She's moving on with her life"
That's what makes this group so great; we keep each other honest without being too harsh on each other.