*deep breath* First - Puppy - last night was the first time I shut off the outside light. He came home to a dark house. He actually came home just as I submitted that post so I just pretended to be asleep. No we don't have an alarm system.
Steve - thanks for stopping by my thread. I've read some of your advice to others and I can see you have a lot of wisdom to offer. What you are saying is so hard. I get it with my mind, but my heart is still having a hard time catching up. I've got some other stressors going on in my life at the same time as this and sometimes I am just hanging on. I'm not making excuses, I just don't feel strong enough for this some days.
But what is my alternative? To keep taking this? It just might destroy me...
I guess I get really confused with the DB approach I read about with being the WAS's "friend" - being kind, upbeat, etc. and then taking this more hard line approach. When is that called for, in what circumstances etc.? I get really confused by the various approaches.
I'm not morally comfortable with dating when I am married. I understand making it look like I am and being more mysterious etc. The hard thing is that when the bomb was first droppped my H was actually trying to convince me that I should find another man and was even making suggestions about past boyfriends and encouraging me to get in touch with them. WTF? So, I don't think that will get his attention, just justify his behavior even more - maybe make him feel relieved. I don't know. I just feel pretty hopeless right now, and pretty defeated. Makes it hard to be upbeat and cheerful when I see or communicate with him.
I hear you. I know I need the 2x4's. The question is whether I am strong enough to do anything with them. I always thought I was a stronger person than this. I can't believe what this is turning me into and I just can't seem to find the courage here. But don't give up on me! lol Rabbit and Cutter - thanks for the encouragement and hope you are both hangin' in there too!
