I guess you both have to acknowledge what happened if you're going to move forward on the path of reconciliation.
When I say bring you back to the point before the bomb was dropped, I meant bringing you back to a point just before that fatal event occurred where one spouse told the other that they want a divorce.
Technically you're right, it's not accurate to say back to that point, you want to get to a point where the idea of divorce is no longer considered the only option. When the WAS wants to work on reconciliation, that is when you are at the DB touchdown line, successful reconciliation, successful marriage counselling and real cooperation by the spouses involved to create a new relationship that is better than the old is what scores the actual touchdown.
Divorce busting is getting you to the point where the WAS reconsiders the marriage and wants to work on repairing & improving it with you as a partner: you are both deciding at that point to work on it, it isn't just one person dictating to the other what must be done, it's a joint decision.
