No, I totally don't agree. I used to disagree so strongly, that I figured agreeing would be a nice 180.
I knew I'd mess it up, but it's done. I was trying to be brief-ish to avoid saying too much and getting all relationshipy. I'm gonna go back to ignoring him.
Yes, I think he might be the only one who can help fix the computer. No one knows the weird ins and outs of the network he has set up. He's also the only one who knows all the pwds and log-ins. I need all that information from him before I can even consider finding someone else to help.
Mess up is a pretty strong phrase... I'd just say you could have done it differently!
I hope he comes through on the computer. Make sure you hang on to whatever information you get ahold of about that. You don't want to be dependent on him.
I will, and I don't plan too. If I have to, I'll take all the information and call a professional. Of course, letting someone else touch his computer set ups would really make him hate me. lol
Well, taken as a statement on it's own, I think I disagree. I think that maintaining your honesty with yourself is pretty important. When you start lying, where do you draw the line. I think that when you validate, you are giving your partner the emotional side of agreement, without necessarily ageeing with the facts.
Him: The sky is green today. You: It does look like it might be green, doesn't it? or You: I can see why you would see it that way.
Agree with anything your mate says or does. Put a good name on it. Agree with their negative feelings. You see, when the wife has a closed mind and is divorcing a husband, she is in love with her negative feelings. So she puts her negative feelings in charge of the door to her mind. And when you try to reason with her, you’re telling her that her negative feelings are wrong. That causes her negative feelings to lock the door tighter. Agree with her negative feelings – whatever they are. “Yes, this relationship is hopeless.” “Yes, you will never be able to trust me. That’s exactly correct.” Do not defend yourself. Just agree, sound sincere, and shut up.
Well, I see where he is headed. And maybe he is right. But I like the validate approach better. I'm not a big believer in two wrongs making a right. Especially when I think you can send the same message without being untruthful.
I think you can validate, BE sincere, and shut up. Even better.
