Hello Kittyfish & Sandi2!

[BigJohn]

Hopefully we will have a package put together soon so we can move forward and cash my W out of the house.

Good luck BJ, I am pulling for you. Now that I am out, I have found an extra measure of peace. I believe you will find the same after, so keep that in mind as you progress. You'll get an even more objective view of things without her around all the time 'in your space' so to speak.

That brings a whole new set of questions. Would you even want to save the MR if she comes back around? And many more, although you man already be contemplating those..

IWITW,

I'm pulling for you too. Yes, I do believe that once my W moves out I will develop even more objectivity regarding my sitch.

Regarding saving the MR, my W at this point would have to do A LOT of changing herself for that to even be a possibility. I don't see my W cleaning up her act anytime soon though. That would require accepting PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY along with HARD WORK which according to her, perfect Rs (i.e. her and OM) should not require. So, she remains confused and obsessively devoted to OM who she is STILL talking to on a regular basis. But that is her problem, not mine.

Have a great week and thanks for checking in.

[Butterfly1]

I'm so sorry to hear about this. We all hope to DB our way back into our M's but so often we support each other through D. We're still here.

And keep on sailin'...

[iwantittowork]

That would require accepting PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY shocked along with HARD WORK sick which according to her, perfect Rs (i.e. her and OM) should not require.

I agree with you 100 percent here, and have heard the exact same things, perfect R's require no work, etc. Doesn't even seem based in reality at all does it?

Thanks for your thoughts BJ!

[BigJohn]

Hope/IWITW,

Thanks for the feedback guys. Just another day in the Twilight Zone for me....

[iwantittowork]

Just another day in the Twilight Zone for me

I have that music now stuck in my head as I am reading your posts...

Seems appropriate...

[BigJohn]

Just another day in the Twilight Zone for me

I have that music now stuck in my head as I am reading your posts...

Seems appropriate...

IWITW,

I know how that goes...someone mentions a song and it just sticks in your head for awhile playing over and over. Now that you've played The Twilight Zone over in your head a zillion times, here's a new one for you: "Another One Bites The Dust". See how long it takes to get that one out of your noggin!

I'm heading out to the gym. Have a good one.

[Butterfly1]

Oh great. Now I have "Another One Bites the Dust" dubbed over the "Twilight Zone" theme in my head. Thanks guys!

[BigJohn]

What a perfect soundtrack to play in my head right now! Shall we add Bohemian Rhapsody to mix while were at it?

I'm feeling evil today...

[sandi2]

Doesn't even seem based in reality at all does it?

That's just it......they are not living in reality.

[Heartbroken20]

Regarding saving the MR, my W at this point would have to do A LOT of changing herself for that to even be a possibility. I don't see my W cleaning up her act anytime soon though. That would require accepting PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY along with HARD WORK which according to her, perfect Rs (i.e. her and OM) should not require.

BJ - You would NOT believe how many times I have heard "it shouldn't be this hard" when discussing MR. All of her divorced friends say the same thing (no wonder...).

And of course, personal accountability should be avoided at all costs as that might make it seem as if one had made a bad decision. And we ALL know any decisions made purely based on how you are feeling can't be wrong...

We are both meeting with D lawyers this week, and like you seem to have already done, I am beginning to think it's time to just cut her loose and let her live with her choices...

Oh, and one more song to add to the mix: "Your Time is Gonna Come" by Led Zepplin. Fits nicely....