((((MJ)))) I know it must be hard. I know it must seem hopeless with D stuff moving along. None of this is easy and not what you would have chosen. You believe God is in control and He has your best at heart. That may be with your H or maybe not. Who knows. But you have to believe that. And remember, a D doesn't necessarily mean it is over. I have heard enough stories of restored marriages after a D.
And I definitely think you should go after all you are entitled to!
