Up until now, I have been feeling nothing but guilt, shame and sorrow. I have been trying so hard to be the nice guy and putting off my conflicting feelings of anger, distrust for my wife that I have been letting her play me.
I keep telling myself that such a nice woman, wouldn't be like that. I forget she's an alien. As you folks keep pounding it into my head, I am slowly starting to get it. I can't promise 100% turnaround immediately, but...
I can stop reacting to everything she says and does. I can work on forgiving myself for past actions. I can stop talking about R. I can do more to GAL. I can stop letting her see my pain and hurt. I can create some mystery. I can detach much more - and that I think is most important. I can really listen when she says something - then walk away if it's about R - or continue to listen and vailidate if it isn't.
