Dusk, glad to hear you had a good weekend! Sounds fun, and it's great you have wonderful friends around you, you can lean on. That's the best thing for anyone in our sitch.
Well, I texted him back on Saturday that I pd. on my student loan & replied, OK, we need to get together & talk. Are you free tomorrow afternoon?" Well, I wasn't - had plans to look at houses w my sister (she's looking for one). So I texted back, Sorry I'm not. What's up?" He replied, We need to discuss how to get the process moving". So of course my old fears came right back, I knew then I am not really detached, or detached enough by now. So I texted him that I couldn't really talk then & would email him.
I felt I needed to set a boundary as I felt so stressed last Aug. when he was really pressuring me, so I emailed him that when he texts me to meet the next day, after no contact for a mo., I feel disrespected. And could he please give more alternatives? And I asked if he had his own health ins. (he's been on mine for a long time, but got a new job in Aug.
(BTW Coach has a great thread called Boundaries - good reading. I used his examples as model).
Today he emailed back this: "I didn't intend to disrespect you. I hadn't contacted you in a month because you last said that you were still interviewing lawyers and I wanted to give you time to find one you were comfortable with.
My wanting to talk to you wasn't a demand, just a suggested time. I understand it was short notice and I understand if you're busy. That being said, I think it's time that we sit down and talk this through. Maybe we can get together next Sunday if that works for you." And asked if he can stay on my ins. through Nov. I was prepared for an ugly response, so I am getting a reply ready now. I am not sure about meeting w him, but I really do feel like let's get this over with. I don't want to stay in the house, it's too big, has problems, & way too many memories of our M. One of the houses I looked at could be a potential rental. Just trying to figure out my next steps. Sorry for writing a book!!!
Hope you keep feeling better - PMA! I'm trying to get it/keep it. And find more ways to fill my weekend! Have a great week (((Dusk))))
