Spouse Suffering From Depression

[Lucky11too]

So…this weekend…Saturday afternoon, H came over for S’s 1st pumpkin carving. He was so moody. I could tell his depression was coming back again strong. So, he ends up getting off work that night and comes to his parent’s house to for the party they were having too. When it’s time for trick-or-treating, H doesn’t want to go with us all. (Hello, it’s S’s first time!) Whatever. When I get back, he’s just sitting in the front yard by himself still all moody. S fell asleep so I took him home to my parents house & then came back. When I get back, H says he’s leaving to go to a bar with his uncles and get drunk. Great! (oh, but I could come if I wanted. Uh,yeah. Courtesy invite?) I was pretty upset. I’m glad I came back just for him to leave again. So anyways, one of his cousins (also my friend) invites me to go out with her. I agree and we go out and have a great time. Then the drama starts. H keeps me up the rest of the night texting me all these crazy things. This is the conversation - It starts with:

H - “Do you like the single life?”
M - “Nope I would prefer a life with you.”
H - “Should have thought of that before you left me last year. Enjoy single life.”
I don’t respond
H (a bit later) - “Get any numbers tonight?”
M – “Don’t be silly. I’m not that kind of girl.”
H – “So why did you leave me then”
M – “We’ve been over all that. We can’t change the past, but I’m here for you now. We can only move forward & become better people for it. I love & care for u very much & I believe u still care for me as well, so it’s time to let go of all the anger so we can start a new better future together.” (I still can’t believe he blames me for getting help when he abandoned me. Not going to play the blame game though. I can take responsibility for my role in all this)
H – “Enjoy your buzz”
I don’t respond. (btw, only had 1 drink. Not even close to being buzzed)
H (a few hours later) – “Still can’t believe you went to long beach without an invite. At least I stood local and told you how whack it was. Kind of makes me wish I went out to Newport and partied. Not gonna forget this easy.”
M – You left to get drunk with your uncles. I came back b/c I thought we were going to be able to spend the evening together & maybe even the night too. I just want you to choose me. I’m here! You made the choice to go out drinking with your uncles. I was there…
H – You made your choice. You clearly knew I didn’t want to be there. You won’t be hearing from me for awhile.
M – “I’m sorry u don’t wanna talk to me anymore but that’s your choice. Just take care of yourself, k. Your depression really seems to be attacking you right now. =(
H – Leave me alone. You are pretty good at that.
M – Not sure what that means b/c I’ve been here for u, but it that’s what u want…

End of conversation…

Are we really having this conversation? I couldn’t believe it. One, he left to go get drunk with his uncles. Secondly, for the past 1 ½ years, he has continuously gone out this partying with other girls, & has he ever once invited me? NO! It hurt though - him telling me that he wasn't going to talk to me & just to leave him alone.

What do you think? I think it was probably a good thing to do that without him because he has to see what life would be like without me. It’s hard though – I just don’t want it to backfire…